Some people have a natural knack for knowing how to start a conversation with anyone and make it seem interesting and effortless. Others begin to speak and look like they are doing some kind of Jerry Lewis impersonation. For those who really want to know how to start a conversation but don't know what to do, listen up. I'm going to give you a few ideas and I'm going to tell you what to do rather than what not to do.
Do, take the time to find and memorize some humorous sayings or short quips. Have these sayings always ready to use them in applicable situations. For instance, let's say someone is talking about how much mischief so and so's kid creates or perhaps she is lamenting to mischievous nature of her own child. You can toss in something like this, "Well, you know what they say, you should always smack your child every day. If you don't know why - he does!" Examples such as this will create giggles and perhaps feelings of camaraderie, at least among those who have kids!
Do; find some common ground with whomever you are trying to start a conversation with. If you are at a party, perhaps you have noticed that neither of you can do the Macarena. Or maybe both of you like to drink the same kind of beer. Always try to be perceptive and you can definitely notice little nuances about others that will allow you to start interesting conversations.
Finally, Do, take the time to relax and enjoy the process of talking to another human being. I think the biggest obstacle that people face when trying to learn how to start a conversation is that they put too much pressure on themselves and worry too much about what they are going to say next rather than listening and interpreting what their conversational counterpart is communicating to them both verbally and non-verbally.
These three suggestions above are small in scope but can produce big returns in your quest to learn how to start a conversation.
1 comment:
I agree with you on your points. One thing I would add though is when you are trying to start a conversation with someone, always make sure to keep your questions simple. Compound questions confuse the other party and they'll generally only answer one piece of your multi-part question.
Also, keep your questions broad without narrowing their options. For example, narrowing their options in a business setting might sound like, "What are you struggling with? Is it time to market? Is it low productivity? Is it loss of market share?" It tends to skew the results and you are less likely to get an accurate or comprehensive response.
Once you have asked a simple but pertinent question, shut-up and make sure you really listen to what the other person is saying.
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